Latent Hopes
by Mrs. Singing Violin
Summary: Post-episode for "Latent Image." Another explanation for Kathryn's fever.


Title: Latent Hopes  
Author: Singing Violin  
Summary: Post-episode for "Latent Image." Another explanation for Kathryn's fever.  
Disclaimer: The characters and universe are borrowed from Paramount.  
Feedback: Please.  
Archiving: Anywhere.

Captain Janeway was moving so rapidly away from the holodeck that she failed to halt in time to avoid a collision with a large, male officer who happened to be walking in the opposite direction.

"Excuse me," she mumbled, looking down at the floor and hoping the crewmember would allow her a graceful exit from the scene.

He grabbed her arms and held on while she stiffened with mortification.

"Kathryn, are you okay?" he asked worriedly.

The use of her first name…uttered by that voice…she sighed with relief as she looked up into the concerned brown eyes of her first officer.

"Fine," she clipped, knowing it wouldn't be enough, but hoping nevertheless that he'd leave her alone.

"Why aren't you with the doctor?" he asked, still not letting go of her.

"I…uh, he seemed to be doing better," she explained. "He dismissed me."

Chakotay raised an eyebrow. "And you think he'll be fine without supervision?"

Hesitantly, she nodded. He kept his hold on her as he continued, "There's more, isn't there?"

Feeling trapped, she struggled to keep her composure as tears threatened behind her eyes. She blinked and swallowed, then decided to tell the truth…a brief version, anyhow. "He thought I was ill. I was tired and fell asleep, and he claimed I had a fever. I didn't want to trouble him."

Chakotay smiled enigmatically, then carefully raised a hand to her face. "You are a bit warm."

She slapped his hand away. "Oh, not you too. I'm fine, really."

"Then you won't mind if I walk you to your quarters," he answered.

"All right," she conceded.

Finally, he released his grip, then suddenly bent down, rising with something in his hand. "You dropped your book," he observed, handing it back to her.

Her face reddened slightly, and she hastily grabbed the object from his hands. "Thank you."

The rest of their journey was in silence, and once the door opened to her quarters, he asked if he might come in. She agreed, too shaken to resist.

As the doors closed behind them, she couldn't hold back any longer, and she quickly dropped the book onto the coffee table before raising a hand to her face, stifling the sob that had been aching to escape for quite some time.

He was at her side in an instant, taking her into his arms, allowing her this moment of weakness without question. Silently, he stroked her hair and waited for her to calm down.

It wasn't long before her outburst ended, and she pushed him away and sat on the couch.

Awkwardly, he stood in front of her and asked, "Can I get you something to drink or eat?"

Still wiping away tears with the back of her hand, she shook her head. "I'm fine."

At the third utterance of this phrase in the last few minutes, he suppressed a giggle. Then, suddenly, he knew. "It's happening again, isn't it?" he asked.

Looking up at him with wide, blue eyes, she nodded.

"How long has it been?" he asked.

"Just a few days," she admitted. "I don't want to hope."

"Why didn't you let the doctor examine you?" he asked. "Then you'd know for sure."

She shook her head. "I couldn't…not now, not again. And not with him still struggling with his decision. I mean, what if he decided, to save my life, he needed to…?" Her trembling voice trailed off before the tears could return.

"Oh, Kathryn," Chakotay sympathized, sitting down beside her and putting an arm once again around her shoulder. "It'll be all right. I'll go on a vision quest tonight, ask the spirits."

"No!" she cried emphatically, moving away from him. "No spirits, no doctors. For now, I just want to wait and see. I can't hope again."

He swallowed, nodding. "All right," he agreed. "But you have to take care of yourself. Vitamins, food, decaf only coffee, and at least seven hours of sleep each night. If you were nodding in the holodeck, you need it."

"I know," she whispered. "You'll cover for me?"

"Always," he answered unhesitatingly. "But right now, you need to sleep."

"Join me?" she asked.

"Of course," was his reply.

Half an hour later, she lay nestled in his arms, and he kissed her neck. "I love you, Kathryn Janeway," he told her, "whether or not we ever have a child."

She turned to face him and kissed his tattoo. "I wouldn't have even tried if you didn't," she replied, then added, "I love you too."

Shortly thereafter, all three of them drifted off to sleep.


End file.
